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Monthly Archives: May 2007
Dear Mum…
May 18, 2007 – 6:53 pm
Dear Mum, – today I did something really bad. I couldn’t find my work boots so I used your wellies to do some concreting. To save you the time and energy I am just about to go and lock myself in my room. I’ve also taken the liberty of borrowing one of your slippers to [...]
What I need…
May 17, 2007 – 5:37 pm
A shower. Some vegetation time – preferably horizontal – maybe involving a sofa and a crap film. Dinner – thai green curry would be nice… A drink – obviously a pint of Strongbow – straight from the fridge. A massage – my back and shoulders wrenched mercilessly by someone large, muscular and unattractive, possibly from [...]
Mmm shiny…
May 16, 2007 – 7:11 pm
I’ve just picked up my loverly truck from the oficina. Now it’s a loverly shiny truck with new oil and grease and tyres and all that stuff. If trucks could smile it would be grinning from mirror to mirror. It’s been a few years since it went to the day spa for trucks so I [...]
Nature – it gets everywhere…
May 15, 2007 – 7:12 pm
The Grindstone is supposed to be a building site. Unfortunately somebody forgot to put up an eviction notice in ‘birdy-beasty talk’. It was like a nature reserve at work today – swifts flying into the house and doing their swoopy, swifty flitting nonsense. Giant bumble bees droning their clumsy flight paths into anything that doesn’t [...]
Stop making sense…
May 13, 2007 – 10:09 pm
I was draining some pasta earlier whilst trying to verbally prise my progeny away from the TV to force some nutrients into his scrawny body when I had a David Byrne moment. The world stopped spinning momentarily and the words ‘how did I get here?’ leapt into the forefront of my mind. I’m sure I [...]
Open for business…
May 13, 2007 – 10:16 am
I’ve just received notification from the powers that be that the WBC is now accepting applications for blog appraisal. Please be aware that approaching the World Blog Council for evaluation will only result in frustration and offence. There will be huge delays as the entire system is in beta and has no intention of upgrading [...]
Coyote ugly…
May 11, 2007 – 10:04 pm
History has witnessed me awakening in the strangest circumstances – like the time I regained conciousness wedged into a cast iron bath in a dormitory block at Ashford Girl’s school. Or on a moth eaten sofa in Tooting curled up with the somewhat fragrant bass player of a well known Irish music ensemble. Less about [...]