…due to a painful and excessively embarrassing incident involving an ancient snowboard, a distinct lack of finesse and my unprotected coccyx – I’ve been spending too much time cruising the interweave for idle stimulation. In an attempt to distract my mind from my aching derriÃ¨re I’ve found myselfÂ following numerous threads on surfing forums and surf video upload sites.
Expecting to find like-minded souls dissecting the fabric of the universe in a suitable complicated and organic manner I found anger and disparity amongst brethren. I found fellow surfers using expletives suitable to sailing folk and a level of rage usually found only within the studio walls of the Jerry Springer show.
I am horrified that people can spend so much of their precious moments on this planet finding ways to insult each other. They should be giving each other big virtual hugs – not hurling internetty hatred around. It makes me mad to think that creative energy is wasted on purile filth and lazy humour. Haven’t these idiots got anything better to do than whittle away their lives in cyberspace – making facile obsevations about people that they don’t even know. What a bunch of plebianic morons – making up flobbing great, narky, shite words that aren’t even real flippin English. Get a pigging life you tossing no hoper wanky bar-stewards before you give us intellectual surfers a bad name….
I didn’t surf today.
Illustration taken from ‘Papersurfer – diary of a middle aged surfer‘.