Sleepless in Cha…

…it has been said that there is a someone out there for everyone – the other half that makes you a whole.

Of course finding that elusive spirit in this swirling maelstrom of humanity seems at times to be an inconceivable task. There could be a fleeting moment of connection in a crowded commuter train or a sideways glance on the M25 during rush hour. Could these be moments lost – never to be found again? Or if fate truly has those paths mapped to coincide will they pass together again…?

The internet has created an amazing dynamic for worldwide connectivity. Businesses thrive, depend and exist entirely on its structure. Social interaction has become a different beast entirely, making the task of communication an ease and a pleasure. Youtube, facebook, flickr and blogging have all become second nature to young and old. So as the ease and frequency of communication online augments does that mean the depth of communication goes with it or are relationships built over the internet in a diluted format. I know people whose entire social structure is based online – they may like the lack of commitment or the anonymity or the fact you can hit delete or even ‘close window’. This isn’t so easy in real life – you can’t switch off channels to your friends and family without consequences. Is this why online ‘buddies’ are sometimes preferable?

If the friendships that you build online are valid and real then who’s to say that these can’t evolve? As you peer through someone’s onscreen persona and get to know the true person behind surely a real bond can form. As in any relationship – it’s about sense of humour, interaction and gaining a sense of a persons true character.

And if that’s possible – maybe one day fate might throw the other half of you into your inbox – just a thought….

I didn’t surf today.


  1. i once had the experiance of a passing moment on an esculater at oxford circus tube station,you know the kind eyes locked as a she asscended and i on a whim and feeling very brave i quickly caught up with the girl that i shared a special moment with,in my head it was going great she was going to be the girl of my dreams and we would connect on all levels we would elope to gretna green and raise 3 wonderful children in a cottage wich had a stream running through the garden,that was untill beutiful girl in quetion gave me a face full of pepper spray and called me a sex pest,stick to the internet its much safer.

  2. Mate – that’s tragic. But to be fair you are a sex pest so she was only doing her duty for mankind. Don’t know about you but I’m really looking forward to work in the morning…

  3. What an interesting post Pen.
    I am a firm believer that there is someone for everyone. But seeking that half to make the whole is increasingly difficult these days with the pressures & demands that are placed on us.
    I am always happy to hear when internet relationships work out in the ‘real world’ too, because both halves have had the courage to take that step to further what ever bond they have formed.
    It is a risk you take whether you have met someone whilst shopping in Sainsbury’s or on line.
    I could write loads about this but you will be grateful I won’t…. just to say I have had those fleeting moments in life that makes you go ‘mmmmmm interesting!!’but after reading AD’s comments maybe that is also far too risky as well!! lol

  4. thoughtful. well timed, too… i’ve assumed that there isn’t ‘one and only’, but likely ‘many and hard to locate’.

    passing interaction (at the office) with a gent from the UK this week – knowing that something powerful lurked beneath the surface for us both. but also knowing that it would be impossible to confirm, and even more impossible to follow through if confirmed…

    so we soldier on. not waiting for that thing, whatever it is, if it even exists. living aggressively, not waiting, but wondering what it might feel like to find it.

    internet? why not? there’s an interesting ‘self-selecting’ phenomena out here – we are drawn to those whose words resonate. And this can be sort of efficient – especially if you choose to live in the mountains, away from crowds! 🙂 Don’t give up…

  5. Did you see that prog the other day about some people who met on ‘Second Life”- fascinating. It’s only an extension of human activity [with all the same pitfalls and mistakes being made].

    I’ve given up looking for Mrs Right – so I’ve decided to stay with your mother – sorry

  6. i think you should make yourself whole and then just get on and love as many wonderful human beings as you can in whatever way is available to you. now come over here and give us a big fat organic snog you sexy beast!!!! xxx

    warning – vocal incoming on its way, get the seagulls ready tee hee

  7. But if it’s true there’s someone out there for each of us, what if that someone dies without us having met him or her? Does that mean we’re doomed to spend the rest of our lives sans the real thing?

    I think all relationships – including friendships – whether online or offline can develop and/or die off.

    Cool post, P.

  8. Ms Teeny – I had a special moment in Asda recently when I realised the most attractive person in there was my father. Things haven’t been the same since…

    I think you’re right about the many and hard to locate Ms Daisy – especially when the goats are the prettiest thing in the village. Not they’re not good converationalists mind…

  9. Dad – don’t apologise to me. It’s Mum that needs it, especially after all these years…

    Mum – I love the milkman. He’s like the father I never had…

    Ms UDH – crikey. Big, fat and organic? Hey can your sound engineer split the vocals and send them as a seperate track? Then I could play with them… x

  10. Hey loverly Lizza!
    I hope nobody is doomed to anything – especially being sans the real thing! You’re absolutely right of course – in some ways it’s harder to keep online relationships going as people can slip in and out of sight so easily. Hope all is good… x

  11. Ooo dont know i’ll ask him. I might have to post you a cd cos they are quite big files. Can you email me your address. Then you can play with me all you like sweetpea ha ha ha. Good post today, got me thinking lots. I mean if we didnt have this cyber connection so we could talk to each other i think our lives would be just a little bit more grey. Mine would. I might never have read the thoughts of people like 70’s and Baby or yours for that matter. Tell AD to do exactly the same thing again if he was in the position too. Not all women are so fucking uptight – some might think its quite a romantic thing to do. I did. And dont pin your happiness on one half of the life pie, you can slice it more ways than that. Right i will stop bossing everyone around now. Oh no hang on – God i miss your arms….. get on a plane this instant young man lol x

  12. Pen OMG you must be traumatized (but possibly not for the first time in your life I would imagine) &you are obviously not shopping in the right places … saying that I figure I don’t either (you should see the calibre of males in my Tesco !!!!they are either married with an ‘wandering eye’, scroaty or shopping with their Mums aka still living at home at 40 plus wearing a tank top and sensible slacks)…the motto is … never give up as you never know who is around that corner 🙂

    UDH (aka young chicklet) I hope you are not too traumatised reading my thoughts 🙂

  13. on the contrary 70’s (my fave decade by the way) and i am with you on the Tesco male selection box – very disappointing at my store too. All young and gangly or older and with a look of defeat about them. I wonder sometimes if i stripped naked at the cheese counter if any of them would actually notice, or care. What does scroaty mean btw- new terminology to me. I am really hoping it has nothing to do with the innards of a mans trousers lol. xx

  14. Upsidedowney chicklet gal 😉 yes I have discovered that despite all the press hype about ‘the waytogo to finding singlets (& not a vest)is to visit supermarkets and to peek in mens baskets to judge their eligibility is all rubbish (I sort of knew this any how!). Scroaty or ‘Scroats’ where I live means ‘ you really don’t want to associate with them if you have job and a standards.. they have no job because they don’t want one and would rather the State provides for them or illicit a living through crime’ erm lets say I would rather be single for the rest of my natural than to settle for that

  15. Ahhh..thank you 70’s. No, not that attractive sounding i must say. I usually find talking to men is a slightly better way to ascertain their suitability. But then again if you looked at my track record maybe i should start sniffing aroung their grocery baskets. And to what twin said – gosh only 7, I must be a greedy little lovepig then cos i was hoping for more than that before i hung up me boots. I think if love (any kind) is offered genuinely it should be taken where its found and enjoyed for what it is no matter how brief. Its all good for you. But then i am a practicing hippy at heart… x

  16. Not always easy to have faith in the swirling maelstrom of humanity but I think daisyfae couldn’t be more right. Not waiting and living aggressively … might just be surprised where it takes you. Like 4,449.56 miles from home, for example. x

  17. if the goats start with the ‘come hither’ looks, remember – “Baaa means ‘no'”. Will keep you from being pepper sprayed and labeled a sex pest in the goat community…

  18. Miss UDH – have you been confiscating blue Smarties from children and then eating them all yourself…?

    Seven Twinny? Cripes I went through my quota a bit sharpish. Can I start again…?

    Ms Daisy – their mouths say Baaa but their eyes are singing a different song….

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