Qualifications must include –
A love of building sites – this is a prerequisite for all Papersurfer ‘family’ members.
Some level of aptitude in one or more building trades (for example – a central heating engineer would score very highly).
Artistic and musical inclination beneficial but not completely necessary.
A total lack of ‘hormonal clock’ issues. Both single mum’s and child haters welcome to apply (you have to like Papersurfer Junior though – because he’s loverly).
A love of the sea and/or a love of my love for the sea. You either have to surf, like loitering around on the beach alot or like doing something else somewhere else whilst I’m away for weeks on end surfing. This is non-negotiable.
Body shape and size is not an issue neither is hair/skin/eye or toenail colour – although being utterly gorgeous is absolutely necessary.
You must like having lots of nooky at random times during the day. I normally go to bed at the end of the day because I’m tired out from building or surfing or a bit drunky or all of the above. Of course you’re welcome to give it a go…
Ooh and snogging’s good too.
Ladies called Mr Woppit need not apply.
I didn’t surf today.